I've always felt like I had two sides of me, two cities or two husbands ( * keep dreaming gal*) one I know like the back of my hand, one that is demanding, one that is safe. The other one I don't really know, I flirted with him when I was younger, forgot we ever dated, one I am wary of, one I don't really know.
This one this unfamiliar one is the "One" I feel God is leading me to. I could be wrong. It doesn't fit. It doesn't look right. I wasn't trained to write. I didn't go to any writing class. I don't even have confidence in myself yet I have decided to stick with "him".
The familiar one has been my life. my goal, my obsession for twenty years of my life. Medicine is what I know. Medicine is comfortable. Medicine is home.
I will always call myself the unlikely almost unwilling writer. I often ask myself why I am doing this. I don't feel confident. Beta readers have not fallen in love with the book like I imagined and reimagined in my head. Yet I am running blind. I am still working on the novel, revamping story arcs, povs , removing an entire character and looking for a line editor. Still, its out of my comfort zone.
But the beauty of this is, I am taking a leap of faith, the same leap of faith I took when I left my life in Chicago Illinois and moved to Washington DC for medical school. No plan, no real understanding of who God was but I read Hebrews 11 verse 1 and with no clear plan and I leapt.
I am leaping again trusting He will catch me before I fall
Medical Residency Interview number four on Monday!
Until next time folks, be B. A.D.D, bad like that